Just say NO

I am currently sitting at the laundry mat washing my running gear.

There currently is a man talking to himself.

I am eavesdropping.  Um, so far the conversation is about lawn mowing and India.  But I just went a step beyond listening.  I was my typical self and had to ask a probing question. 

Me: so how is your week going?
Bubba: it goes in spurts.  But Americans have it so good.  In India they sleep upright.  The reason why they do not fall over is because there are like 30 people in a room. 
Me: what were you doing in India?
Bubba: I haven't been in India before.  I JUST KNOW.
Me: Oh.....
Bubba: don't tell on me I have beer in here.  Want to drink with me?
Me (totally lieing and would never fool a monkey's uncle): um, I don't take from strangers...
Bubba: you're a smart kid.  I wouldn't take from me either.

I WANT MY CLOTHES TO BE DONE NOW!!!!